AA wording: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity”

Secular wording: “Came to believe that spiritual resources can provide power for our restoration and healing”

Practical wording: “Trusted that a healthy lifestyle was attainable through social support and consistent self-improvement”

The Step of Hope

I feel that I’m further along with this step than the last time I worked it. I recall the words “came to believe” being the crucial bit, i.e. you don’t have to have a faith but that it could be a gradual dawning of belief, trust and faith. I have now seen the positive effects of praying in my way and trusting and committing and the positive benefits that they bring to every aspect of my life. The book the Woman’s Way through the 12 steps says “coming to believe means setting aside our illusion of control”.

i was also recently reminded of my insane behaviour around food. It’s easy to kid myself “I wasn’t that bad” because i wasn’t someone who had a lifetime of calorie counting or diets or purging or restricting. But i think I was just lucky to get away with it weight-wise for so long! To be honest, if i could keep getting away with it weight-wise, i think the sugar binges wouldn’t be bothering me so much. It’s a bit like the alcoholic wishing they could keep drinking if only they didn’t get hangovers!

Reading the chapter again, i was reminded of the words that rang true last time – the acting in an extremely irrational and self-destructive manner and know this happened after my relapse at Easter. The driving miles for a particular chocolate or dessert to satisfy a particular craving, the lying about what I’ve eaten, stealing the kids’ Easter chocolates, eating beyond feeling full, eating feeling bloated already, eating two breakfasts one day just because it was there and gone up to my highest weight outside of pregnancies.

This chapter talks about compulsive eaters as people of extremes – overreacting to slight provocations (me, all the time), obsessively busy or utterly exhausted (hello me!), if we can’t have it all then we don’t want any (this is actually good when it comes to abstaining from alcohol and sugar however – I literally can’t see the point in one glass of wine or one piece of chocolate). It says that in life as well as with food “we were irrational, unbalanced, and insane”. And to change this way of living, we need to find a Power greater than ourselves to restore us to sanity.

last time I tried to use an imaginary best friend as this Power. I think this time, I’m going to stick to OA as my HP – the Power of the programme and the group because when I listen and follow what works for others, life is much saner on all fronts. I have found a book that I’m really enjoying “The alternative 12 steps: the secular guide to recovery” written by two women and I love their explanations. They have the following definition: “spiritual power comes from whatever gives us peace, hope or strength and enhances our humanity”. I couldn’t see how i could genuinely incorporate the spiritual element last time. I was kind of faking it hoping i would make it. I read somewhere that you don’t have to know or understand how it works, just believe that it can. And truly, I can see results every time I turn it over – to what I’m not sure, just that i do and it works!

AA wording: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity”

Secular wording: “Came to believe that spiritual resources can provide power for our restoration and healing”

Practical wording: “Trusted that a healthy lifestyle was attainable through social support and consistent self-improvement”

The Step of Hope

I feel that I’m further along with this step than the last time I worked it. I recall the words “came to believe” being the crucial bit, i.e. you don’t have to have a faith but that it could be a gradual dawning of belief, trust and faith. I have now seen the positive effects of praying in my way and trusting and committing and the positive benefits that they bring to every aspect of my life. The book the Woman’s Way through the 12 steps says “coming to believe means setting aside our illusion of control”.

i was also recently reminded of my insane behaviour around food. It’s easy to kid myself “I wasn’t that bad” because i wasn’t someone who had a lifetime of calorie counting or diets or purging or restricting. But i think I was just lucky to get away with it weight-wise for so long! To be honest, if i could keep getting away with it weight-wise, i think the sugar binges wouldn’t be bothering me so much. It’s a bit like the alcoholic wishing they could keep drinking if only they didn’t get hangovers!

Reading the chapter again, i was reminded of the words that rang true last time – the acting in an extremely irrational and self-destructive manner and know this happened after my relapse at Easter. The driving miles for a particular chocolate or dessert to satisfy a particular craving, the lying about what I’ve eaten, stealing the kids’ Easter chocolates, eating beyond feeling full, eating feeling bloated already, eating two breakfasts one day just because it was there and gone up to my highest weight outside of pregnancies.

This chapter talks about compulsive eaters as people of extremes – overreacting to slight provocations (me, all the time), obsessively busy or utterly exhausted (hello me!), if we can’t have it all then we don’t want any (this is actually good when it comes to abstaining from alcohol and sugar however – I literally can’t see the point in one glass of wine or one piece of chocolate). It says that in life as well as with food “we were irrational, unbalanced, and insane”. And to change this way of living, we need to find a Power greater than ourselves to restore us to sanity.

last time I tried to use an imaginary best friend as this Power. I think this time, I’m going to stick to OA as my HP – the Power of the programme and the group because when I listen and follow what works for others, life is much saner on all fronts. I have found a book that I’m really enjoying “The alternative 12 steps: the secular guide to recovery” written by two women and I love their explanations. They have the following definition: “spiritual power comes from whatever gives us peace, hope or strength and enhances our humanity”. I couldn’t see how i could genuinely incorporate the spiritual element last time. I was kind of faking it hoping i would make it. I read somewhere that you don’t have to know or understand how it works, just believe that it can. And truly, I can see results every time I turn it over – to what I’m not sure, just that i do and it works!